In the movies, the husband wakes up, rolls over, takes one look at his wife (who slept in full makeup), and makes mad passionate love to her, morning breath notwithstanding.
In real life, I roll over, my husband takes one look at me and says, “Oh my God! Do not go out in public today. People will think that I punched you.”
In all fairness, this is what my eyes looked like this morning, and still look like. 
On Friday, I undertook a spring cleanup in our yard. When I came into the house and passed a mirror, I noticed that there was swelling in the corner of my left eye. I figured it would go away, but the swelling got worse and now there is a big, swollen, red circle around my eye that leaks. The center of the circle is white. I self-diagnosed as having been bitten by a tick. I’ll probably go to the doctor tomorrow to see if I have Lyme Disease. I live in Connecticut, so the odds are good.
Meanwhile, I’ll keep my husband out of prison by hiding indoors. I’ll also wear sunglasses round-the-clock to spare my family’s sensibilities.
Patsy Porco's Blog: Free and Worth It! 
I’ve had that response from my hubby too, though my last injury was from hitting my head on the hinge of a lower cupboard in our kitchen as I was bending to look in the back of the cupboard, and the time before that I hit my head on the underside of a towel-hook in the bathroom, again from bending. (A novelty hook in the shape of a duck, and I now wonder if the previous owner put it there as a message to ‘duck’!)
I am enjoying your posts. 🙂
I once put a wooden duck plaque over a low door, as an inside joke with myself. I’ll bet your previous homeowner did the same thing! Thanks for the feedback!